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The NLP Meta Model has three categories. Distortions, generalisations and deletions. And using the acrostic MLCCP UM NUS to help us memorise it we get:
1. Mind Reading
2. Lost Performative
3. Cause and Effect
4. Complex Equivalence
6. Universal Quantifiers
7. Modal Operators
9. Unspecified Verbs
10. Simple Deletions
So far we have covered Mind Reads, Lost Performatives, and Cause and Effect. In this session we look at Complex Equivalence.
A Complex Equivalence is about the relationship between two thoughts, ideas, events or objects. Where meaning is attributed to an event. Something means something else, that is A=B. For example, a man is late for his dinner date. The woman says out loud with a disappointed tone of voice, “You are late.” She thinks to herself, “He does not love me anymore.” She then decides to go out with another man. When her partner asks her why, she says, “Well I thought that you did not want to be with me.”
A Complex Equivalence can be recognised as two separate thoughts, statements, ideas or events that are connected in the way that A=B. What is missing is the linkage such as ‘that means’,’ that just means’, ‘it must be that’. Once we have identified the complex equivalence we can challenge it to gather more information.
A Complex Equivalence is different to a Cause and Effect. “I hate it when you are late.”, or, “You make me angry when you are late,” is a cause and effect. “You being late means you don’t love me is a Complex Equivalence.” The Complex Equivalence is at a higher level of abstraction.
Challenge a Complex Equivalence to get the two statement that are linked, and/or to get a counter example. For example, “So does A have to equal B? Does it always have to mean that? Could it mean something else?”
So we start with the example, “You are late again. You don’t love me.”
We challenge the Complex Equivalence by asking, “How does my being late mean that I don’t love you?”
And the answer that we get could be, “I believe that when two people love each other that they phone ahead of time if they think they might be late.”
*** There are 12 NLP Meta Model videos in this series. Make sure you watch all of them.
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You can find Abby Eagle at http://www.abbyeagle.com
NLP Hypnotherapy and Meditation
Gold Coast, Australia